At first glance, you would think this was a healthy food item, ya know, because it’s called Smartfood.
The second ingredient is vegetable oil (corn, canola, and/or sunflower oil). These oils are heavily processed, which means no bueno.
Another ingredient is maltodextrin. Maltodextrin is an ultra-processed thickener that can cause blood sugar spikes, issues with gut health, gas, bloating, and diarrhea.
It’s absolutely disgusting that a company can be so manipulative as to call its product “Smartfood” when it’s so fuckin’ bad for you.
Which corrupt government agency is responsible for letting this take place?
Are there no restrictions on food labels to protect us from harmful food—or at least let us know it’s not smart to eat it?
Why isn’t crack cocaine called “I feel absolutely incredible when I smoke this shit,” yet companies are allowed to manipulate people into thinking a food product that causes diarrhea is healthy? Although, I’ve heard cocaine can cause diarrhea, too.
The worst fuckin part is the product is marketed towards children as a snack. Un-fuckin-believable! They’ll do anything to put profits over people.
My daughter Mia wasn’t feeling well, so she went to the doctor. Here’s a copy of what he wrote. Check out the diagnosis: “Bad cold.”
I wonder, is that a term they use in medical school? Do they teach you the difference between a “good cold” and a “bad cold”? Is there a medical chart ranging from 1 to 100, with “good cold” at 1 and “very bad cold” at 100?
And why is she unable to attend school but cleared to return to all physical activities? Too sick for algebra, but burpees are fine?
At least the prescription wasn’t a pile of unnecessary bullshit medication that will only destroy her liver and cause kidney damage, further destroying her health till she ends up over medicated, drooling from the left side of her mouth and being pushed around in a wheel chair, which is just like they want us so they can soak our insurance companies till we end up dead. According to them, another satisfied customer.
We’re in a fuckin war here against BIG PHARMA AND BIG FOOD!!! A war far worse than the war against terror! Your weapon is your body and how you treat it!!!! You ain’t got your health you don’t have to worry about being terrorized. You don’t eat well and don’t lift heavy shit, and your family watches you die a painful and miserable death.
And while we’re talking about health, how about a little emphasis on EATING WELL, GETTING ENOUGH PROTEIN, AND MOVING YOUR BODY? Those habits deserve attention long before you walk into a doctor’s office.
These are the people we’re trusting with our health, and I’d like a little more explanation than “bad cold.” How about, you are deathly ill or you’re fine?
I should put on my retired cardinal uniform, head down there, and give him a piece of my mind. Somebody needs to hear a confession.
We have a responsibility, too. If your family and friends eat like shit and never train, SAY SOMETHING. Encourage them. Invite them to work out. Help them get started.
WATCHING YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS NEGLECT THEIR HEALTH WITHOUT EVER SPEAKING UP IS DOING THEM A PROFOUND INJUSTICE.
REAL FRIENDS CARE ENOUGH TO HAVE THE UNCOMFORTABLE CONVERSATION. EAT WELL. LIFT HEAVY SHIT. HELP THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE DO THE SAME. WATCHING FRIENDS AND FAMILY WASTE AWAY PURELY FROM NOT LIFTING OR EATING WELL IS DESPICABLE AND COULD END UP IN TRAGEDY, LIKE BEING IMMOBILIZED IN A HOSPITAL BED WITH A NURSE HAVING TO WIPE YOUR ASS AND CHANGE YOUR DIAPER EVERY 8 HOURS.
LISTEN TO ME!!! I’M A MAN OF THE CLOTH!
Every 3 Minutes (4) Sets: Run 200 Bike 10/7 Cals Devil’s Press x 7 @35/20
Mostly—I’d change “our life” to “our lives” and smooth out the second sentence:
This is what happens when we eat ultra-processed foods instead of EATING OUR MEAT, CHICKEN, FISH, AND EGGS.
Our growth gets stunted, and we end up staying the size of a 3-year-old for the rest of our lives.
This is why it’s so important to EAT WHOLE FOODS AND NOT BE MANIPULATED INTO EATING THE JUNK PUSHED ON US BY BIG FOOD!!!
THIS IS SERIOUS SHIT!!!!
Look at him!!!
At least Jay is training.
Run 400 2 ROUNDS I’s, Y’s and T’s x 10 Banded Int/Ext Rotations x 10 Banded Pull Aparts x 10 Face Pulls x 10 Inchworm x 10
Warm up to a weight that you can get for 6-8 reps Perform 1 Drop set of each exercise Set up the weight so you can drop the weight 4 times. For example, if you can get 100lbs for 6 reps your set would look like this: 100lbs, 90lbs, 80lbs, and 70lbs
1. Bench Press 2. Barbell Row or Seated Cable Row 3. Shoulder Press 4. Rear Lateral Raise 5. DB Side Laterals 6. Front plate Raise 7. DB Skull Crushers or Cable Press downs 8. DB Tricep Kickbacks 9. Barbell Curl or Cable Curl 10. Concentration Curls
Run 400 1 Min Deep squat 10 Goblet Squat 10 Squat and reach 10 Cossack 10 World’s greatest stretch 10 Cat Cow 10 Bird Dog 10 Dead Bug 10 Star Plank 10 Single Leg Glute Bridge
Every 3 Minutes (5) Sets 3 Back Squats (Increase weight from last week) 8-10 RDL 10 K2E (Slowwwwww)
15 Min Amrap 20 Wall Ball 15 Swings 10 Burpee over Med Ball 5 Pull up
There seems to be some confusion about why I constantly tell people to EAT MEAT, CHICKEN, FISH, AND EGGS.
Let me explain.
Ideally, everyone would eat well 90% of the time. Unfortunately, most people don’t. That’s why I keep my advice simple and limit the choices.
If I told you to eat meat, chicken, fish, eggs, vegetables, fruit, and nuts, what would happen? Most people would start loading up on bananas, mangoes, grapes, dates, and pineapples, which contain plenty of natural sugar (natural sugars spike insulin also). And let’s not forget the massive handfuls of nuts, which are extremely calorie-dense.
Now, there’s nothing inherently wrong with fruit or nuts. The problem is that most people have trouble controlling what fruits and nuts and how much they eat.
So when I tell you to stick to MEAT, CHICKEN, FISH, AND EGGS, I’m not saying those are the only foods you should ever eat. I’m trying to simplify your choices and keep you focused on the foods I want making up the majority of your diet.
The fewer opportunities you give yourself to overeat, the easier it becomes to stay on track.
It’s not about perfection. It’s about making better choices consistently.
Trust me, I know what I’m talking about! I’m a psychotherapist!
This is Michele crushing a farmer’s carry with two 53-pound kettlebells.
Besides tackling heavy-ass farmer’s carries, she deadlifts 250 pounds, back squats 185 pounds, does unassisted pull-ups, and knocks out burpees like a thoroughbred!
That’s what she is. A FUCKIN THOROUGHBRED!
She could probably hold her own racing against the ponies at Belmont.
Michele is an absolute beast in the gym, and recently, she’s made a real effort to eat even better than she did before.
Over the past couple of months, she’s managed to completely change the shape of her body by eating MEAT, CHICKEN, FISH, EGGS, and LIFTING HEAVY SHIT!
Michele likes to give some of the credit to being sick and not eating much.
I CALL BULLSHIT!
Michele has been paying attention to what she eats, training consistently, and putting in the work. And the results speak for themselves.
She looks FUCKIN INCREDIBLE!
And beyond all that, she’s just a wonderful person. She walks into the gym every day with a smile on her face and brings an energy that makes the place better for everyone.
Anyway, as I watched Michele carrying those heavy-ass kettlebells, I bellowed across the parking lot:
“YOU’RE SO FUCKIN STRONG, YOU’RE NEVER GONNA DIE!”
“NO WAY YOU’RE ENDING UP IN SOME HOSPITAL BED WEARING A DIAPER AND DRINKING YOUR DINNER THROUGH A STRAW! EVERRRRRR!”
Without missing a beat, Michele yelled back:
“NO DIAPERS FOR LIFE!”
THAT’S IT! I said.
THAT’S THE NEW LTS SLOGAN!
NO DIAPERS FOR LIFE!!!!
Thanks, Michele, for the inspiration, the laughs, and for bringing your beautiful self into the gym every day.
On a side note…
GET YOUR FOOD LOG GOING ON CHATGPT!!!!
It helps a LOTTTTT!
It helped Amy realize she wasn’t eating enough protein and gave her a better understanding of how some of her food choices, including dates, were affecting her calorie intake while trying to lose a little chubbiness!
You don’t have to obsess over every calorie. Just pay attention to what you’re putting in your mouth!
LISTEN TO ME, IT’S SO FUCKIN EASY!!!!!!!!!! NO MORE SEARCHING FOR FOOD MEASUREMENTS, YOU JUST TELL CHAT WHAT YOU EAT!!!!
I KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT!
FOR CHRIST’S SAKE, I’M A SCIENTIST!!!!
Run 400 Hip Airplane x 10 Single Leg RDL w/ KB x 10 Cat-Cow x 10 Bird Dog x 10 Side Plank clamshell x 10 Dead bug x 10 Single leg glute bridge x 10
Every 3 min x 5 Deadlift x 5 Bulgarian Split Squat x 8 ea. Cross Body Swings x 10 ea.
5 sets x 10 reps of each DB Hang Cleans 50/35 Alternating Reverse Lunges 50/35 (70% weight on the front leg, no bouncing) Thrusters 50/35 Pull Ups Hand-Release Push Ups Ski 250/200 Before each round
Our own Sloane Friedland, who trained with us during the summer, is playing lacrosse her freshman year at Muhlenberg College.
Some of you have trained with Sloane, and some of you have no idea who she is, but I can tell you this: Sloane trained hard all summer to get in shape for the season—and get in shape she did, crushing her 1-rep maxes along the way.
Sloane is holding a fundraiser for the lacrosse team. Through Swim Across America, Nick’s girls are also holding a fundraiser for cancer research.
They’ll take part in a swimming challenge on October 18th. They’re dedicating the challenge to one of the founders of Nick’s company, who has been battling breast cancer all year, just like our lovely Lorraine!
Log into ChatGPT, Grok, or whichever AI app you use.
Tell it your age, weight, height, and body fat percentage if you know it.
Then tell it that you are going to log everything you eat and every workout you complete throughout the day.
Be specific.
For food, weigh and measure as much as possible and include the brand when it matters.
For exercise, enter the exact workout: exercises, sets, reps, weights used, and how long the workout took. It can also keep track of your training history so you don’t have to remember what weight or reps you used the previous week.
Next, tell it to keep a daily food, calorie, macronutrient, and activity log.
Ask it to calculate approximately how many calories you should eat each day based on your information and whether your goal is to lose weight, gain weight, or maintain your weight.
Then have it keep a running total of your calories and macros throughout the day and alert you when you are approaching or have reached your daily calorie goal.
From that point on, all you have to do is speak to it throughout the day and tell it exactly what you ate.
For example:
“3 Vital Farms eggs, 6 oz. of Bell & Evans chicken breast, and 1 cup of coffee with 1 tablespoon of half-and-half.”
That’s it.
Instead of obsessing over calorie-tracking apps, scanning barcodes, or manually entering every ingredient, you simply tell AI what you ate and let it keep track for you.
DO THIS NOW!!!!! YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO TYPE ANYTHING, JUST SPEAK TO IT!
20 PVC Pass throughs 10 PVC Overhead Squat PVC Int/Ext Rot. 1 Min Deep Squat 10 Goblet Squat Cat-Camel Bird Dog WGS Side Plank Clam Shell McGill Curl Ups :03 hold for each rep
34 Min EMOM Minutes 1-4 – Row – :30 on/ :30 off 1 minute rest Minutes 6-9 – Double KB Clean & Press – :30 on/ :30 off 1 minute rest Minutes 11-14 – Bike – :30 on/ :30 off 1 minute rest Minutes 16-19 – Double KB Snatch – :30 on/ :30 off 1 minute rest Minutes 21-24 – Ski – :30 on/ :30 off 1 minute rest Minutes 26-29 Double KB Thruster – :30 on/ :30 off 1 minute rest Minutes 31-34 – Overhead Double or Single arm KB Sit up or Ab mat Sit up – :30 on/ :30 off (Do what you can correctly and quickly)
This is Diana. Diana has been doing Crossfit for 20 years. She’s a terrific person, can be a little moody sometimes but all and all she’s wonderful!
Diana recently tightened up her diet.
Why?
Because her daughter is getting married this month, and looking great in her dress was more important to her than her late night snacks.
Diana had a strong enough WHY to make the uncomfortable choice.
Maybe that’s what you need if you’re stuck in an eating rut and can’t seem to stop the nightly ritual of standing in front of the refrigerator like you haven’t eaten in six weeks.
You don’t need another fad diet or some dumbass social media training routine, you need a better reason, you need to stop your fuckin bitching and start eating MEAT, CHICKEN, FISH, EGGS AND LIFTING HEAVY FUCKING SHIT! IT’S SO FUCKIN SIMPLE! STOP WITH THE FUCKIN SNACKS!! DRIVES ME FUCKIN NUTS!
Diana is 60 years old and looks fuckin’ great!
Most 60 year old people look like they are 90 and knocking on death’s door.
Not Diana.
Why?
Diana seems to think some of it is just society and all the advancements we’ve made.
I say that’s pure bullshit and hogwash.
I DON’T THINK PEOPLE FULLY UNDERSTAND THE POWERFUL EFFECT THAT NUTRITION AND TRAINING HAVE ON THE BODY. IT’S FUCKIN PREVENTATIVE MEDICINE!!!!
HELLLLOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
IF YOU DON’T TRAIN AS YOU AGE, YOU LOSE STRENGTH, MUSCLE MASS, MOBILITY, FLEXIBILITY, BALANCE, COORDINATION (ASK ANNIE😂) AND YOUR FUCKIN LIFE.
YOU SPEND DECADES DOING NOTHING AND IT COMPOUNDS, YEAR AFTER YEAR, YOU GET WORSE AND WORSE UNTIL YOU’RE WALKING HUNCHED OVER AND DRAGGING YOUR LEG LIKE SOME GIMP.
And then an injury happens.
That’s when you really see the difference.
People who have spent years doing nothing, eating like shit, and avoiding anything physically difficult can get absolutely crushed by an injury that a stronger, healthier person would handle much better.
Go sit in a physical therapy office or a doctor’s waiting room for an afternoon, it’s like you’re walking amongst the living dead. Actually, you don’t even need to visit an office, just look around you when you go out the house. Everyone’s a fuckin mess!
Strength matters.
Muscle matters.
Nutrition matters.
Consistency matters.
THE PHARMACEUTICAL COMPANIES CAN’T PACK MEAT, CHICKEN, FISH, EGGS, REAL FOOD, AND LIFTING HEAVY SHIT INTO A PRESCRIPTION BOTTLE AND SELL IT, THAT’S WHY THEY DON’T PUSH IT.
The longer and more consistently you train and eat well, the better chance you give yourself of staying strong, capable, metabolically healthy, and independent as you get older.
Every day you neglect your strength and nutrition is another day you decay, decompose and rot.
So find your reason.
A wedding.
Your kids.
Your grandkids.
Your health.
Your independence.
Looking good naked.
I don’t care what the fuck it is, just find it and do it! I know what I’m talking about, I have a lab coat and scrubs!
Run 400 1 Min Deep squat 10 Goblet Squat 10 Squat and reach 10 Cossack 10 World’s greatest stretch 10 Cat Cow 10 Bird Dog 10 Dead Bug 10 Star Plank 10 Single Leg Glute Bridge
Every 3 minutes (5) Sets: 3 Back Squat (increase weight from last week) 10 Reverse Hyper 10 GHD Sit ups SLOW AND CONTROLLED!
Every 3 minutes (5) Sets: 35 Double Unders 7 Power Cleans @135/95 (Touch & Go) 15 Wall Ball
Tomorrow is the Peter Parkinson’s walk at Theodore Roosevelt Park in Oyster Bay. The activities begin at 10am and the walk is at 11am. If you have your special edition Spider Man / Peter Parkinson’s shirt from last year, wear it! The gym will be open in the morning if you want to go, and then go to the Park for the walk!
